A Guide to Surviving a Gothic Novel as a Young Woman
October 10, 2022 | Dara Marie | @thornfield_laneAs it is now the second full week of October, there is no more denying that “spooky season” is upon us. There are many reasons to love this season including sweaters, warm drinks, pumpkin pastries, changing leaves, and–my personal favorite–gothic novels. I’ve said it at least once before, but gothic is one of my top literary genres. I’ve read more than my share of them.
In a fair amount of them, there’s a common motif of women–particularly young ones–being taken advantage of. The context, conflict, and consequence differ from story to story, but there are a few consistent components. We can learn from these fateful heroines how to protect ourselves as young women if we ever encounter gothic circumstances.
So, ladies, here is a guide to surviving in a Gothic Novel:
Don’t Fall In Love
I am aware of how cynical this sounds. I’m either a hopeless romantic or a straight-talking realist and there is no in-between. I’m the latter at this precise moment.
Everyone knows that love blinds you to reality. You’re not focused and will let a lot of things slide. But in a Gothic Novel situation, you need to be laser set on getting out of there in one piece. You need to focus on yourself and yourself alone. Exceptions can be made for close friends and family, but you don’t have the time to be melancholy over whether he reciprocates your feelings. Babe, there are more important things to worry about.
The spinster’s life is the survivor's life.
2. Please Explore, Just Not at Night
You may be asking yourself: how will I know if I’m in a Gothic situation? The first dead giveaway is an isolated location. Whether you’ve only just arrived or lived there your entire life, take the time to familiarize yourself. Know every creaky board, every wandering corridor, and every escape route should things go awry. Searching the attic and basement or cellar is a MUST, I don’t care how many spiders are in there.
Chances are you’re not alone so you might find it difficult to slip away unnoticed. This is not a valid excuse for choosing insomnia hours to conduct your investigation. I don’t care how bright your candle is, you are not safe at night and especially not alone. Do what you have to: wake up at the crack of dawn, pretend to be sick during dinner, piss someone off to the point they’ll leave you alone—something. Explore. But (repeat after me) not. at. night.
3. Keep Your Windows/Doors Locked
So, we’ve established that you need to not explore at night. What should you be doing? Ideally, resting because you will need to be on your guard and ready to fight your way out at any moment. If you can’t sleep, at the very least, you need to stay in your room. Keeping doors and windows locked is an added measure of safety because it allows you to control what enters and what leaves, which should be nothing (remember, don’t fall in love so no late night visitors).
If Catherine Earnshaw bangs at your window crying for you to let her in–DON’T. She’s already dead and is just trying to torment her abusive ex.
4. Be Rational
Hopefully staying away from love has helped you curb your romanticness. Now all you have to do is retain your rational side. I fully understand that seeing ghosts could make anyone lose their mind, but in this situation, losing your mind equals death. Your wits are your first weapon and will be all you need if you play your cards right.
99.99% of the time, it’s just in your head. 99.99% of the time, there is a perfectly logical explanation for it all–you just have to breathe and think throughout every explanation.
5. Trust Your Gut
Along with being rational, you need to trust yourself. Trust when you feel something is off. Don’t let anything slide.
He’s probably not drunk or tired: he’s a psychopath. His possessiveness isn’t romantic: it’s sociopathic. It’s not just a thunderstorm: it’s a warning sign from nature.
6. Go to Therapy
It’s the age-old question: am I plagued by ghosts or just my repressed trauma? Trust me, it’s the latter. Always the latter. And you need to sort that crap out before it gets someone killed. Seriously.
My final tip is by far the most important. Most of these other steps can be avoided if you first and foremost, for the love of all that is Holy—
7. LEAVE THE MANSION
Nope–I don’t want to hear your excuses. I don’t care how charismatic the owner is (or how hot) or if it is your ancestral home: get the hell out of the mansion. Better yet, avoid it entirely if you can. Nothing good happens in crumbling mansions.
Don’t you know the physical house is a metaphor for the mental/emotional state of its occupants? It’s not mold–it’s a toxic family dynamic. It’s not a random fire–it’s the consequences of your past crimes coming in retribution.
I once again reiterate the first step of refusing love because chances are your marriage is the whole reason you’re going to a new home. Don’t let Jane Austen peer pressure you into matrimony: there is nothing wrong with being a spinster. Let’s all go off and be spinster friends; we’ll have cats and drink tea and, you know, stay safe—it’ll be great.
Now, while I wholly believe these principles, I do not expect you to follow them. Why? Because I know myself well enough to know I wouldn’t. I have joked far too many times about 1. running away to England and marrying a young, rich heir so we can inherit his family’s estate and 2. buying an old house because I think there are ghosts (or a crazy wife) in the attic. Between that and my adventurous personality, I would 100% gaslight myself into believing I could outwit the supernatural.
All in all: Happy spooky season. And if you get invited to an isolated mansion, proceed with caution at the very least.
Do you love Gothic Novels? How well do you think you’d survive one? I'd love to hear from you! You can connect with me through thornfield.lane@gmail.com or on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, and Twitter: @thornfield_lane.
